This is why...

I put Him first...
I need silence as I write this
I don't even know what to title this
But I know what I want to say and that is....Thank you
I have to wipe the tears that fall from my eyes
Before I even write the next line to this rhyme
Honestly, this poem gives no justice to describe
This expression of gratitude that I'm feeling inside
I can't even capture the right words to express
So I'll do my best to describe what dwells in my chest
How I feel for you?
Cannot even fit in the form of Haiku
And if I were to write it in words
It would carry more strength than action verbs
There would be no ending, no period, it goes beyond a sentence
It's like your love for me, it's endless
That's why I put you first
Nobody else's love helps me understand what I'm worth
You've been there for me from the beginning
When nobody cared it was you that was listening
I didn't know who You were but you were always watching over me
If I close my eyes and go back through my history
When I should've been protected instead you sent your angels down from heaven
You know the story, every time they'd argue she'd run out the house
But this is the part that I try to black out
It's more painful than my mom's black eye
It's when he came in my room and stood by my bedside
While I was pretending to be sleeping
I was really awake but dreaming
When I asked in my mind for somebody to take me to a place I could hide
You brought me to a place where I believed I could fly
A safe place where every little girl was free to play
That was the first day I learned how to pray
This game of hide and seek became a survival technique
I'd call your name and quickly you came to my aid
So strong you held me close in your arms
While another man's hands took my innocence away
That pillow that my head rested on, was really your lap
You caressed my face while your angels rubbed my back
Gently you whispered in my ear so softly...
My dear, I am here, you have nothing to fear
Have to remind myself when I don't feel Him he's still near
Just as He stood with me then, He still stands with me today
That's why at the end of the day I could careless what people say
Cause He's the only one who understands
When we walk side by side you see His footprints in the sand
When my dad went away it was you that took his place
Yes, I wished I could've seen the look on his face
Every time I made a wish before I blew out the cake
Pretty soon the candles were outnumbered by my tears
They didn't represent my age
But for every year that my daddy wasn't there
From age two to thirty two
Imagine what you could do,if you melted all those candles into one?
If it was sparked it would never go dark
And I'd bet it would be larger than Candlestick Park
And yes I wished it was his arm that I held onto on my special day
But I'm glad that I chose cousin Trav to give me away
But the reason why I smiled was because I knew you were there
When I walked down that aisle
But even though our marriage lasted only a short while
You still walk with me
arm in arm like you're the one who married me
I will never be ashamed of you
I don't care who sees me raise my arms just to praise you
And if they do I will tell them
You are real
That's why this poem gives no justice to describe how I feel
But I know what I want to say
And that is....Thank You

I just wanted to kick this blog off with a poem of thanks to my Heavenly Father. He is my source of strength, guidance and source of LOVE. I am not religious but spiritual. I respect everyone's religious views and will never force mine upon you. If I claim any religion it's LOVE. I follow and strive to be Christ like everyday because He is LOVE. Without knowing Him, I would be dead...physically, spiritually and emotionally. Because of what He has brought me through I will never be ashamed of confessing my LOVE for Him. He is not a gimmick but very real to me. I cannot say I am perfect nor will I ever try to be. I do foolish things on a daily. And in knowing this I now understand the scripture, "He uses the foolish things to confound the wise". I am thankful that I have a forgiving and merciful God who loves me right where I am at, imperfect and all. That is why it is my duty to love others the way He LOVES me.